Sunday 6 August 2006

To Treadmill #5

I know what you're doing.
I saw you doing it to someone else last night!

You lull the user into thinking that you're going to stay at the same pace for the amount of time indicated. And just when the user is comfortable? YOU STOP!

After you made me trip and fall and wonder what I'd hit accidentally to make you stop so suddenly five or ten hundred times, I decided you were possessed. By the devil.

(Or something imp-ish, because I'm sure the devil has bigger fish to fry, so to speak.)

And I've avoided you like the plague ever since.

And then I watched, from the safety of Treadmill #4, while you let eeeeeeeveryone else use you with nooooooo hiccups or startling stops.

I had started to think it had just been my bad luck but, last night, I watched as you suckered that poor man into run-stop-run-STOP-run-run-STOPping on you. Did you see me glaring at you out of the corner of my eye? Shame on you Treadmill #5, shame.

I know what you're doing.


To the rest of you:
Why I haven't complained to the people in charge about Treadmill #5 you're wondering?

Well, sillies, I don't want Treadmill #5 telling all the other Treadmills that I'm a troublemaker and need to be punished. Just to be on the safe side, ya know?

*crosses fingers, knocks on wood and pats lucky rabbit's foot*




Heh, just kidding!





I don't have a rabbit's foot.

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