Wednesday 4 August 2010

Something


I know I talked about it already, but the whole idea of missing out on things has been floating around in my brain still. Since. Whatever.

What's been rattling around in my brain, however, is more the idea that maybe I missed out on guys I shouldn't have.

And I know, I know, what's meant to be will be and who's meant to be in my life will be and I wouldn't be who I was without my past experiences, I know all that, but what's on my mind here is that I maybe missed out on dating, being with, maybe even marrying good guys because I convinced or told myself that they weren't something or other.

You'll maybe say it's being picky, and maybe it is, what do I know, but I think now, lately, I've been regretting the guys I didn't date because I told myself there wasn't "something" right about them, or there wasn't a something I wanted.

When I think back, there have been really genuinely nice guys I haven't dated because they already had a child and I'd, at the time, told myself I wouldn't date someone with a child. (I'm still unsure about this one, in fact, but have dated a couple of guys with kids. Just didn't get to a point where I met the kids) There were guys who didn't have a certain look to them, or maybe didn't attract me in a certain way. Guys I didn't click with instantly or guys who weren't, I don't know how to put it other than "something" enough. Something.

And is it ok to keep looking for those guys who have that "something"? Or am I just keeping other good guys at a distance because it's easier that way, less scary that way? I don't know any more.

Not that, at this point, it really matters.

But, still. Have I missed out on guys because of something that I can't even define? Am I making mistakes and losing out?

And how am I ever supposed to know?

4 comments:

Kas said...

When 'it' happens ... you'll know. I met my husband and- even tho; we were both married to other people at the time- I really did KNOW that HE'S the "ONE". His wife left him (not related to me) and I left my 1st husb (because of alcohol abuse and girls AND the fact I had met W). W didn't CAUSE my divorce, he gave me the strength to survive it.

You Will Know.

Anonymous said...

Don't forget the bald headed old guys... :P

Doitagain said...

Sigh...I guess we will never know-I sometimes question myself about this same exact subject. Especially lately, since I just turned 41 and am still single (not to scare the crap out of you or anything, haha, im sure we'll both find our very own The One someday. But I digress).

There is one man in particular that I really regret not pursuing-but I was 21 and he was 29 and wanted to get married...totally freaked me out and I ran far away. At the time I knew it wasn't right, and I guess now that's what I should hold on to-that feeling that I "knew" he wasn't the right one. But...was I just being super picky? I've turned down two pretty darn great marriage proposals in my life, what if there are no others? Sigh...

Victoria said...

I do hope it happens, Kas, although I've thought I'd found the right guy before and, well, wasn't right. So I do hope it happens and I know :)


Will do Bruce :)


It is hard when you question yourself Doitagain. Especially when the question is like yours. *hugs*