Wednesday 2 February 2011

Truthfully

Someone asked me the other day how I was doing with my Dad and his illness.

I gave my usual answer "Good, thanks" and then I thought about it.

It's half true. I am coping well.

But I'm not dealing with it.

I'm just stuffing it all down and trying to keep it all tidy and away down and I can see myself being more tense than usual, snappier and shorter tempered, more tired, less social.

I'm not dealing with it so even though I'm coping well on the surface of things and I'm strong and together and "everything's fine thanks" I can tell I need to un-stuff.

I have to deal with it because it's making everything else bigger; it's amplifying concerns into worries and confusion into anxiety.

I'm glad run clinic started up again, I think that'll help a lot and I guess I should maybe find someone to talk to or go scream into my pillow or something, I don't know.

I just know something has to change.

And that's good.

7 comments:

Just Sayin... said...

I strongly recommend finding someone to talk too.
It was the best thing I ever did!
Ultimately in the end, it saved my life.

Screw whatever stigma other people attach to seeing a professional.

Just remember, their word is not gold. Sit on whatever they say for a week and you can go back on the next appointment and say, "I think you're wrong etc".

They help utilize the tools to cope at a higer level.

All the best!
Remember you're a rock star!

Single and Picky said...

I agree with Just Saying - sometimes talking with someone who isn't a friend or family member can be really helpful. They can give you tools to think and work through the process of this and other aspects in your life you may have questions about.

Victoria said...

JS, I don't attach any stigma to it at all, I think it's great and think everyone should do it. Thanks for the encouragement!

SnP, it is true, a neutral person can help.

Kas said...

I have also visited a professional in my many years of dysfunctional family life.

If you find a good one-- IT IS GREAT. The 'not so good' ones... OY.

Good luck....

~Kas

Victoria said...

Thanks Kas :)

Yvonne said...

(((hugs)))

Victoria said...

Thanks Y