Friday 11 March 2011

This Is What Happens In My Brain

Ok, it's been bothering me for a while now, so I'm turning to you for help.

How come zombies crave human flesh? I mean if it's to sustain them, then wouldn't they die after a certain amount of time without "eating"?

If they don't need to eat human flesh to stay, er, "alive" then why are they all crazy to eat us? Is it just to create more zombies? To procreate in their own way?

But then why do they eat humans instead of just biting them enough to infect them?

And if they just want more zombies, don't they realize that eventually there won't be any humans left to zombie-fy?

But now I'm just getting off into tangential questions.

What I really want to know is, if zombies are biting to spread the "virus" that's all well and good (except not really) but if we're saying they bite because they're hungry in some way then why don't they die off when they can't find humans to eat after a while?

Because how else am I supposed to survive if they never die?

13 comments:

Kas said...

Now I have ONE MORE THING to worry about!!!

Are you SURE you and my daughter aren't one-and-the-same????

LOL!

Dugout Daisy said...

ok so i am a zombie fanatic... and i think you would get a kick out of this book, also it would totally answer your many concerns but probably give you new ones too, hahaha!
here's the wikipedia link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Zombie_Survival_Guide

you can never be too prepared! ;)

Jonathan Beckett said...

Here's another thought - how come Zombies don't eat EACH OTHER!?!?

Victoria said...

Nah, don't worry about it Kas! It's all just pretend :) But, yes, I'm pretty sure you're not my Mom! :D

Fun Daisy!

Because they taste gross Jonathan!

Dominic said...

It's perfectly simple:

You can't have a movie with a scary title like "Night of the living dead!" that features vegetarian zombies harmlessly stumbling around getting in people's way.

That's why you only see zombies eating vegetables in a certain well-known game where plants are your only means of defence, so their being eaten is, in its own way, scary...

Next you'll be wondering why vampires suck blood out of humans instead of just buying black pudding from the store :)

Victoria said...

PvZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Er, I mean, good point Dominic!

Chad said...

I was just reading Pride And Prejudice And Zombies, it starts off by saying:

"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in posession of brains must be in want of more brains."

You see? You had it all wrong, zombies don't want flesh at all, they want brains. They are sometimes even fooled by cauliflower, as it resembles brains.

To further answer your question: while they do eat plenty of brains, they do not use them for any other purpose -- hence no planning for what happens after they've eaten them all.

It is good luck for us that Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth and other saviours of our race exterminated the undead menace centuries ago.

(On a side note: I thought the Pride And Prejudice parts better than the And Zombies parts. Though the bits where Mr. Collins doesn't realize his wife has turned into a zombie are pretty funny.)

Victoria said...

Ahhhhh, well that explains it then! ;)

I've wondered if that book was a good read, Chad. Would you recommend it?

Chad said...

Been away a bit...

It is good, but, the good stuff is virtually all Jane Austin's. There are a couple moments when the zombie theme is amusing, but I was surprised by how much I kept thinking it would be better without it. I've not read Pride and Predujice but I strongly suspect it's better.

You could always try reading Bronte's Wuthering Heights. That's more vicious than any zombie book... or any other book I can think of :)

For your recent mention of places to meet guys: try dancing. Lindy Hop has the friendliest people in my experience. Extremely welcoming and playful. (Don't do Argentine Tango.)

Chad said...

btw, do you mention when you're nervous to people? I've always found that extremely helpful. I've brought it up at job interviews, speaking to audiences, and with women and it almost always opens things up and sets them and me at ease.

One nice thing is that if you tell a guy you're nervous he can relax because it's silly to be nervous around someone who's nervous of you. Get what I mean?

Victoria said...

Gotcha Chad, and thanks for the recommendations ;)

And, yes, I usually do tell people I'm nervous, well on a date anyway. Then they just generally say "oh, really I couldn't tell" and then I start thinking about how my being nervous might make them uncomfortable but that maybe they're nervous and I should try to make them less nervous and then I forget to breathe!

Chad said...

...and then you pass out and he has to do mouth-to-mouth resuscitation... which can break the ice... or make things awkward...

Well, it all comes back to zombies, doesn't it? The nice thing about dating a zombie is you don't have to worry about what it's thinking -- a zombie wants one thing: brains!

Joking aside you seem to me like a pleasant, intelligent girl and I hope you find a guy you like (or 25 hot guys and a mansion ;> )

Victoria said...

Hmmmm, good point! The mouth to mouth would totally break the ice! ;)

True, I would totally know what a zombie was after. Heh.

And, thanks! :)