Friday 1 June 2012

Back When It Was Easier To Know

The Beauty of Spring Sets My Heart Soaring by foundimagination
When they asked me, when I was little, what I wanted to be when I grew up, I'd say one of a few things.

A princess. (I was sure I was adopted from royalty and would one day be re-discovered.)

A horse trainer.

A ballerina.

A ballerina/horse trainer. (Part time at each I suppose)

And when I was in elementary school: a lawyer.

At some point I remember wanting to be famous, like a rock star or actor or something, but I'm none of these things, and I'm, apparently "grown up."

I don't know what I want to be anymore. I don't want to be a laywer, I got bucked off a horse when I was twelve and that scared me enough that I shied away from them a bit.

My body won't let me be a ballerina anymore, and I'm pretty darn sure there isn't a royal house searching for their long lost heiress.

A famous actor? I think I've passed that age. Famous rock star? Ditto. Plus I'm not madly talented in that way.

I would love to make a strong living being paid for something creative. Writing, photography, some other art form or expression, but everyone wishes that and that's not enough; just to wish it.

So I'm trying to re-find the passion I used to have as a little kid.

I'm trying to figure out what I would jump to answer if you sat me down, gave me a crayon and a piece of paper and asked me to draw you what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Or, you know, from now on.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do more day-dreaming, the answers will slowly come. Kids are amazing daydreamers and it's a lost art for adults to rediscover.

Just a Girl said...

So I am currently a full time student and every time people find that out about me they ask "What are you studying?" And I'm like "School and stuff" because at 29...I still have NO idea what I want to be when I grow up.

Stephanie Hunter said...

Total side note: I was in Washington this past week, and on Tuesday I was right across the water from Victoria! When the person I was with told me that's what I was looking at I thought of you! haha

And, I have a book (story rather) that I wrote in 5th grade. And at the end I wrote, I wanted to be a Missionary, a Detective and a Teacher, Writer when I grew up. So far, I've not been any but I'm working on it! =)

Victoria said...

That's true Anon. Good point.

"School and stuff" sounds like exactly what I'd be studying too Candy!

I hope you waved Stephanie! :) A detective/teacher/missionary would be an awesome story! I love it ;)

Elliott said...

I think this is common issue amongst professionals. I've been a Chartered Accountant for 20 years this year (holy crap, where's the time gone?!?!?!) and I still am not sure what I want to be when I grow up.

I really, really liked my last job, but both plants I was the Controller for closed on the same day back in 2008...so no more job. I found another job in the next town over, but it's not been a great fit. But, it pays well and the commute is 10 minutes, so I keep going.

I'm currently looking for something else, but the 1 hour (if I'm lucky) commute to TO isn't thrilling me.

And, with one daughter in university and another starting in Sept, going back to school for another Masters isn't in the cards right now.

Yeah, trying to figure out what you want to be when you grow up isn't easy for sure. Good luck with the daydreaming...I may do the same thing!

Victoria said...

I hear you Elliott! Good luck to you too trying to figure it out :)