Closer

And I knew we were getting closer and closer because we talked about it.

"I really like talking to you, Victoria."

"I really like talking to you too, Jay."

And I started signing off my emails with "hugs", a sign off usually reserved for my friends.

And he started signing off with "Jay xoxo."

I'm not the same person I was the last time I started a relationship.  And I'm sure as heck not the same person I was when I started the relationship before that.

And so while I was tentative in sharing how I felt with Jay, I also didn't see the big risk.  If he scared off when I said something about how much I enjoyed his emails, then, at two weeks in, it wasn't a big loss.

I think, when I realized, as I said to C-Dawg, that I was falling in like with him, I just turned around and told him I'd said as much to her.

Because it just felt like the thing to do.  To just be open, and honest and upfront with this guy, as he'd been open and honest and upfront with me.

I can't remember what exactly he said to that, maybe he just smiled, emoticon style or something, but I also mentioned, that for whatever it was worth, I was hiding my online profile because I didn't want to talk to anyone else.

And do you know what Jay and I did when I mentioned that?

We talked about it.

Which we've done about everything since the start.

My guess would have been that he would have been like "woah, slow down there mama!" but instead he said "well, are we then committing to getting to know each other and not anyone else?" which... as you can imagine, made me feel all girly and giggly and smile the most beaming smile ever.

I felt shy.

"Yes.  I'd like that, I think.  I mean, yes.  I would.  I'm blushing."

And, oh.  I suppose I should mention that we "talked about it" over the phone.