Wednesday 20 November 2013

Someone Else's Perspective

Vince texted me, he does fairly regularly, just to check in, see how things are going.

I told him about Jay, the accident, the injury, the rest of it.  Vince, like my other guy friend who knows pretty much the whole Jay story said a similar thing to that other friend.  "Jay told you from the start he was going to be a dick. (My other friend just said "this way")"  Yes, I guess he did.

I took risks with Jay.  Pushed past things I wasn't comfortable with because I thought the risk might be worth it.  I saw things in him I valued, and I wanted to see how it would play out.

And I suppose now I know. And I get to choose.

I also told Vince about the online guy who took things down the sleazy path.  Vince's reaction made me smile.

"Tell him that the sexual position you like is him in handcuffs and you with pepper spray."

I like that Vince is on my side, that all my guy friends are, really, but Vince is different because he used to be a boyfriend, so when he's on my side it's easier to believe he really means it.

"You're so much better than all these guys, remember that.  You're smarter, and above them in every other way.  Let them know from the get go.  If you think this guy's a schlep, tell him!"

I don't quite agree with him, I don't see myself quite that way, but it was still nice to hear.  A boost I needed when I'm not feeling so hot about things.

Sometimes hearing what someone else has to say can help shake you out of feeling a certain way, and it's those little moments of providence that remind me that life is ever changing.

3 comments:

Elliott said...

That's a great come back...cuffs and pepper spray.

I only know you from what you write and the pictures you post. You certianly come across as a very intelligent, caring, and independant person. If your Spidey senses are tingling, there is a reason. Trust them.

I agree with Vince. I think you are so much better than guys who stoop to that type of flirting right off the bat. Do yourself a favour and keep looking...as hard as that can be sometimes.

kandijay said...

I know what you are saying. For me, it's like I have two voices in my head. One says, "You deserve better than this," and the other one says, "What if this is the best you can do?"

I do believe I deserve better. I DO. And if I do, you sure as hell do too. :)

Victoria said...

Thank you Elliott.

Fair enough Kandijay! :)