Unusual Is Putting It Mildly

So there I am at 10ish on a beautifully sunny Saturday morning and I'm in a rough place.

I feel raw and open and vulnerable and I know that I really really do not want to contact Jay.  But that if I don't do something, I will.

So I go back to the dating site.

And I scroll through and message a few people just to reach out and make contact with someone and I hear back from one guy fairly quickly.

He's a photographer, which of course, I find interesting, and I like what he's said he's looking for in a relationship, but he says he's a "handful" so I ask him what he means by this.

He explains that his life is quite unusual, and for example, if he shoots models, he needs a strong woman who won't be phased or jealous by this, and that he can sometimes travel and that he just knows he can be a lot to handle and that he needs a strong woman.

I tell him that I don't think I'm a particularly strong woman, but if he thinks he might disagree, we can chat.

We message back and forth for a while and then exchange numbers, and as I'm getting changed for a workout (first one since I got so sick, I'm so proud of myself!) he calls.

Like, bring bring, calls my cell phone.

Now, no one calls my cell phone.  (Except my neighbour telling me my bike was being stolen!) So I'm pretty surprised, and in all the times I've exchanged cell numbers with a guy, it's only ever turned into a text thing.

So I don't answer it, but I listen to the message he leaves and he has a nice voice and I'm kind of like... "huh."

I text him (of course.. that's what my cell phone is for) and say that I was getting changed and missed his call, but that I don't really use my cell.  (I don't, I don't like talking on it, it's awkward, and the reception is rarely good and then I get face slime all over the screen!)

He says he's free for a bit and would like to call so I have no real idea why, except that the day has already been so odd, but I give him my home land line number.

And he calls.

We chat for a bit, I can't remember about what.  I ask him about his kids or something about his work and then he has to go because someone showed up to do work.

I think it sort of helped settle me down or something, because I felt better after we'd talked (flattered maybe?) and I worked out and that helped too.

He texted later, asked how my workout was and if I was free to talk again, I told him I had to shower and left it at that.

It was after dinner Saturday evening when my phone rang.

It was him.

I wasn't really sure why he was calling, but figured I had nothing to lose and so we started to chat.  And for the first while, I was really not loving things.  He told me he'd had a few beers with his business meeting and his energy was just... big.  And loud.  And I was suddenly regretting giving this person my phone number and wondering how I could get out of this conversation but there were also moments where I'd find myself laughing, so I just kept listening.

And because I didn't care, I told him straight forwardly that he was too big of a personality for me.

He said that really he was just kind of nervous, and that usually he was much more chill.

And I get that.

So we kept talking.

About anything and everything, and he told me I was pretty awesome, and that he had no idea why I was single.

I told him at one point that I didn't think I would date him, and I thought that would end the conversation but we ended up talking until I realized it was midnight and had to go to sleep.

Nearly five hours we talked.

I have no idea why.

Or what it means.  If anything.

Or what might come out of it.  If anything.

But you guys, this was certainly the most out of my control sort of "what is the Universe going to bring me now" kind of Saturday I've ever had.

Jay...the "not actually single" guy and that whole thing... and talking and having good conversation with a stranger on the phone for nearly five hours.

It was such a weird weird day.

I had more weird dreams Saturday night, about moving out of my childhood home, and my high school best friend moving out of hers too (even though it wasn't her house in the way dreams work.)  And some other dreams I don't seem to remember now but yeah.

I feel like I'm just supposed to let whatever happen that's going to happen and see.

I would like to take in the fact that both the FWB guy and the long phone talk guy both were very positive about me and I should remember and believe that and remind myself of that when my not so nice voice starts telling me otherwise.

So yeah... that's my so weird Saturday and who knew, eh?