Saturday 29 August 2015

Remembering

As I was thinking of things to write about in these pre-made posts, looking at the dates and times they will be published made me think back to my first travel weekend back in 2013. 

One of the odd things about Burning Man is that it doesn't seem like a year passes between the trips.  Like, my 2013 Burning Man trip doesn't feel like it was two entire years ago.  One maybe?  But two?  Certainly not.

I was thinking back to the Sunday of that year when we realized we weren't going to be making it to playa that day because the RV had broken down.  I'm not writing this to jinx anything, Connor and I had that perfect easy trip last year that more than made up for 2013, so I know it's just a matter of vehicles doing what they're going to do.  I'm writing this because I remember being disappointed but knowing there was nothing I could do to change it, so it was just a matter of finding the best way to deal with what we'd been given.

I do remember being a bit sad that we were losing time there, and I remember being disappointed that Jay was already there and enjoying himself when I wanted to be there and enjoying myself, but I didn't get mad.  I didn't get anxious.  It was out of my hands and we'd figure it out.

Connor mentioned at the time, and even since, that he was surprised I didn't freak out.  I know I come across as a worrier, and I may seem to over-plan, but it is that very over-planning that helps me feel calmer, ironically.

I'm not sure it's the best thing to sit and worry about all the possible things that might happen and go wrong, but in doing so, I always have my safety, security and comfort as well planned out as I can so when something goes glitchy?  I've probably already anticipated that and it makes dealing with it easier.

So I knew we were fine.  We were still in a city, we had automobile coverage (AAA) and we were all mellow folk, but intelligent and able to figure sh*t out. 

It's before the trip that my stress happens.  Or my worrying.... whatever you want to call it.  Once the thing happens?  I just do what I can to adjust to whatever's happening.

So for me, pre-planning may not be all that fun (and quite honestly, my relative zen around the family trip was a new one, and one I'll reflect on for sure) but I feel it helps me feel calmer about the trip in general.

But yeah... it's interesting to look back down memory lane sometimes.  Some of those moments meld together, but some of them are distinct and feel like they're still in 3D.